Fame and the Ambitiously Quiet Life

Pre-Jesus, I was the over-achiever of over-achievers. I worked hard to earn recognition, awards, accolades. It was all a failed attempt to feel loved, to belong, to matter.

Kevin Leman, author of The Birth Order Book, observes (in his chapter about us firstborns) that “perfectionism is a slow form of suicide.” As a teenager who was driving myself to this scary territory, this quote showed me what was at the route of that downward path. Perfectionism.

Perfectionism will sabotage your prayer life, your soul, and your salvation.

The Perfect One will save you

Then Jesus. The God-man who was perfect for us when we couldn’t be, who took on the consequence of death that was meant to be ours.

After Jesus rescued me from my own self-destruction, He also released me from my former slave-driver… My resume. My transcript. Any manmade way of showing that I measured up, or not. And instead, He just loved me. And all the fears faded away, with time, with growing trust that His love truly is unconditional.

Seeking fame and accolades

I watch as a nation of people search for their own fame. They do stupid things in order to earn hearts and thumbs ups from strangers who won’t even remember their names. I’m sure each person has their own motivators, but when I wonder what’s the root of all this fame searching, I would like to take a crack at it.

I wonder if it boils down to fear. Fear of being unnoticed. Fear of not being loved. Fear of not being enough. Fear of not being as good as so and so. Fear of missing out.

Being afraid is the opposite of being unconditionally loved.

Obscurity is a gift.

I planned to title this blog, “Fame and the Gift of Obscurity” until I just googled that and found an article by Emily P. Freeman with the very same title! And it’s one of the very few articles on the internet that I actually remember reading a decade ago, back when I was drowning in a health crisis and severe PPD and basically never could read a thing. Her article obviously planted a deep seed in me and brought me so much comfort back then as I was trying to sort out my calling as an author and speaker. Ms. Emily quotes Earl Andrews:

“The human soul was never meant for fame.”

Yes!!! Everything in me says yes and amen.

While I had forgotten who said this quote and who first introduced it to me, the truth of these words have never left me. My frail soul was never meant for fame! And no wonder I feel such a strong aversion to it!

Only the Lord, the Famous One, was cut out for such a thing.

Roots and fear of falling

Ironically, my biggest fear since the Lord set me free is the fear of fame. I had to surrender this to the Lord. I still have to surrender this. I want no part in fame, and I’ll tell you why. I see what our nation likes to do to people in the spotlight. They briefly dote on them and adore them and put them higher and higher on a pedestal. And then they knock the pedestal down. Father, forgive us. We’ve done this to so many entertainers and speakers.

But a sermon at our Nebraska church home by Kerri DeVries a few years back gave me some hope. She said the reason why a lot of people fall so far after getting in the spotlight is that they didn’t have roots. The tree shot straight up quickly but with no root support structure, it easily toppled when the winds and storms hit. But the tree that suffers drought shoots its roots down deep into the earth, deep and wide. And when the winds and storms hit, it’s unaffected. It bends with the blows and the hail but it does not fall. This one visual image has given me much security.

If you’re in a drought season, do not waste it wanting to be in a spotlight, wanting to be taller than you are. Just go deep. Dive into God’s Word now. Press deep and wide into your relationship with the Father. Fast and pray and build a foundation of faith that can withstand the tornadoes and the tropical storms.

These hidden places teach us to hide in Christ. And there is no better place than hiddenness with Jesus. Hiddenness is where we find that we are unconditionally loved, where fears dissolve, where peace begins to nourish our bones, where shame is washed away. Hiddenness in Christ is where we find we are “loved, accepted, and forgiven.”

(Those are the words stamped above our Florida church home’s doorway. And more than a memory, they are a truth that I lean into daily.)

Feeling seen, even when hidden

Maybe you’re a stay-at-home mom who feels buried up and hidden in diapers and laundry. Maybe you’re starting out in a new profession or calling and you feel inadequate and unseen. Maybe you lost a loved one and feel hidden from your old relationships and overlooked in your community.

Regardless of where you want to be, where you see yourself heading, let’s embrace where we are now. Let’s embrace the quiet life we’ve been given. Let’s repent of the striving for likes and comments, establishing fear as our master. And instead, let’s press into the firm foundation of Jesus, the one who washes away our fears and secures us in His love. Let’s seek the kind eyes of Jesus and capture His gaze instead of seek the fleeting “clicks” of others.

An ambitiously quiet life. That’s our goal. This once felt like an oxymoron to me and sure grabbed my attention as a new follower of Christ. As one who once had a great deal of ambition to make myself known, I’ll never forget finding this verse back when Jesus was breaking me free from the god of my transcript and redirecting my ambitions heavenward. He showed me that it’s ok to be ambitious for the right things.

A quiet life, loving God and loving those in my care and in my circle, working with my hands… that’s a good and beautiful ambition.

I’ll trade fleeting fame for God’s unshakeable love any day.

Jesus, our hiding place. Our firm foundation. The one who loves us deeply and without conditions.

If your find yourself striving after fame or being seen, here are some of my favorite resources to set you free: